Welcome Inside My Head · Track 10

Half Of Me Still Stays

Caitlin Beadles4:29Out now

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Lyric sheet

Lyrics

Verse 1

I see you, and the storm goes quiet,

All my reasons fade in your smile.

Every word I swore I’d say

Gets lost when you look my way.

I forget the nights I cried,

The empty space you left behind.

My heart forgets the pain it knows,

And runs back like it’s got no control.

Pre-Chorus

I hate that I still crave your touch,

When you’ve never really given enough.

I’m split between what’s real and right,

And what just feels good tonight.

Chorus

Half of me still stays, half of me’s running.

Half of me’s numb, half of me’s humming

Your name like a ghost in my veins.

Half of me knows, half of me prays

You’ll change, but you won’t—I know it deep down.

Still I circle back around.

You’re the calm and the hurricane,

And I keep dancing in the rain.

Verse 2

You say “Hey,” and I forget why I cried,

Your smile erases every goodbye.

Swore I’d quit, but I breathe you in.

You hold me soft, then turn to wind.

All the hurt dissolves in your stare,

But when you’re gone, the ache’s still there.

I pull away, but I always grieve—

My head says “Go,” my heart won’t leave.

Pre-Chorus

I hate that peace feels just like pain,

You’re the prayer I shouldn’t say again.

You’re the comfort and the cost,

And I can’t tell which side I’ve lost.

Chorus

Half of me still stays, half of me’s leaving.

Half of me breaks, half keeps believing.

You’re the silence and the sound.

Half of me fights, half of me drowns.

You’re the poison and the cure,

And I don’t know who I am anymore.

Bridge

I keep waiting for you to meet me halfway,

But your love’s a ghost I chase.

And every time I try to walk away,

You show up with that face.

And half of me forgives you again,

Even when I know how this ends.

Final Chorus

Half of me stays, half of me’s running.

Half of me’s lost, half keeps loving.

You’re my peace and my pain,

And I can’t tear the two apart again.

If love is war, I’m losing slow—

’Cause half of me can’t let you go.

Outro

Half of me hopes you’ll fight,

Half of me knows you won’t.

But somehow both sides still love you tonight.

From the notebook

The handwritten lyric page

Half Of Me Still Stays

My head says “Go,”
my heart won’t leave.

You’re the calm
and the hurricane.

Half of me hopes you’ll fight,
half of me knows you won’t.

Both sides still love you tonight. ♡

Behind the song

The story inside it

“You’re the calm and the hurricane, and I keep dancing in the rain.”

I wrote Half Of Me Still Stays about the kind of love that can make every warning disappear for a moment. One look, one touch, or one familiar smile can quiet the storm so completely that my heart forgets the nights I cried and runs back toward the same person who caused the ache.

The song lives inside that split between knowing and feeling. My head remembers the pattern and tells me to go, while my heart keeps hoping this time will be different. The same person can feel like peace and pain, comfort and cost, silence and sound—and holding both truths can make it hard to recognize myself.

This is not a simple story about refusing to leave. It is about grieving while trying to choose myself, and admitting that love does not vanish the moment I understand what it is costing me. Half of me hopes you will finally fight for us; half of me already knows you will not. Both sides are telling the truth, and both still love you tonight.

— Caitlin

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